OH NO! I have fallen vicitm to the most terrible maxim of the United States

The American Dream. The belief that you can do whatever you want as long as you try hard enough, put in the extra hours. Don't feel pity for that bum on the side of the road because if he wanted to be somebody, if he actually tried to find a job and put in the time and effort, it could happen for him. OH HOW FALSE THIS IS.

The best example: the East Harlem drug dealer. society has given this person no other options. there are no jobs that will provide him with a livable wage and the respect he deserves on a daily basis. the man is doing everything to keep this dude down.

knowing this, how do i break past my OWN internal concept of the american dream?

i never understand why people that fail tests don't just buck up and work harder and spend more time on their studies. however, this change in their behavior may not be enough to help them get the grades. some people just don't have the capabilities to suceed. wow, so why do i hold these expectations for myself? why do i acknowledge these facts when talking about "other people" rather than in my case. i get down on myself so hard because if i just tried harder it would all come together. that kind of thinking is what i battle everyday in my Drugs and Society course, but i never take those conversations to heart when the spotlight is on me. yikes. this is revolutionary. neat. thanks drugs, thanks andy ko, thanks tony. i think i have made a breakthrough. wow. awesome. maybe i shouldn't rail on the social sciences so much. what am i saying, OF COURSE i continue to hate those disciplines. lets not get ahead of ourselves. that was almost trouble.

ho ho. well there is some messed up writting for ya. a little social commentary mixed with a little inner monologue.

in conclusion, we have confirmed that i am a crazy person.

great.

awesome.

hope you enjoyed this rant/realization.

ps. i know there are spelling/grammar errors, but i am just too damn lazy to fix them...